"You Can't Have Your Cake...And Eat It Too"

The amount of times I’ve heard that I 'can’t have my cake and eat it too’ in my life is astounding. However, I don’t get it. Am I the only one that has an issue with this saying? You can’t have your cake and eat it too. Of course, I realize that it implies a person shouldn’t want more out of a good thing, or some such nonsense, but as a stubborn, cynical baker, it just doesn’t make sense. And, since I realize you’re all dying to know why, I shall tell you:

Telling me I can't have my cake and eat it too implies that I can physically be holding the cake, but can’t eat it. What? Is this a new form of torture!? I can look at a cake, but I can’t eat it. I can’t even taste the frosting? Just a little bit off the top, I promise…

IT WAS JUST A QUESTION!

So, I started exploring situations in which someone is either given a cake, or makes a cake, but cannot eat it. I’m going to tell you straight up that these scenarios, to me, seemed pretty fantastical.

Scenario 1: Something is living in your cake.

I'm sure frosting can hide the fact that they're extra protein. 

Scenario 2: The cake is for someone else.

SEE? It doesn't make much sense at all. 

Scenario 3: The cake is made out of paper mache

Again, frosting works wonders!

Scenario 4: Your dog eats your cake.

Fair point.

Scenario 5: Your friend eats your cake.

I find eating the cake as soon as it arrives is also an acceptable tactic.

Scenario 6: You’re on a diet.

I think cake IS your diet...

I could go on and on, but are we getting the general message? If you have a cake, EAT IT! If it’s for someone else, EAT IT! If it’s made out of something else, cover it in frosting and EAT IT!

So, you know what, world? I CAN have my cake and eat it too. In fact, I’m going to go make a cake right now, just to PROVE to you that I can eat it. HAH!

Good day.